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Chinni and the moo moo cow

August 7, 2013

I smile as I write today.

But when I wanted to write little more than a month back I had to swallow those choking tears. It was too hard to get used to life without her. I had gone out for a week and come back when she was gone. Yeah a smoother transition I thought, but only until I heard the sound of those ringing bells!

Oh no! My eyes are full again…

When my mind picked up the sound of bells, unconsciously my heart was racing to find little Chinni and show her the moo moo cow. I could never forget the wonder I saw in her eyes the first time she stared at that unimportant cow I had never cared about! To her baby eyes, the tattered untidy glitters that bedecked the cow were powerful enough to arrest her long after they went out of sight. I wanted to see her childlike wonder again but this time she was gone. I knew she had left a void in my heart. I was missing her.

It was strange that I had never heard the moo moo cows before. A child opens our senses to things we’ve learned to miss and ignore: the things arranged in our house below knee level, the bell chime of the ice-cream man, the tone of our angry voices and a love for things and activities we dislike, even hate! Shoppin for groceries used to freak me out! But when Chinni announced that she would accompany me for ice-cream, it was a delight! Quite to the surprise of my folks, actually.  🙂

I don’t think Chinni will be around once again for that long. Even if she was, she may have learned to ignore some of what I have learned to ignore too. She would have grown up. But the memories of her pure innocence that opened my eyes will linger long beyond the weary years which change things forever! There’s so much you can learn from a child.

Love you Chinni.

Maama.

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